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Dr. Phil Covers Chris Watts – and uses the “N” Word

Dr. Phil is an expert when it comes to psychology, right? At 53 seconds into the clip below, Dr. Phil drops the “N” word [Narcissism] for the first time. Let’s listen in.

Dr. Phil describes Watts making “very dumb mistakes which narcissistic people often do, because they only see things from their points of view…”

This must mean narcissists are stupid, because they just can’t see past themselves.

So, like, celebrities…Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Lady Gagga, Madonna, Justin Bieber, Charlie Sheen – how many of these celebrities are dumb because of their narcissism, or just plain narcissistic or just plain dumb?


The “N” word has become one of the most popular words in true crime today. It’s taken over from psychopath, in that regard, as a sort of of catch-all catchphrase label which basically explains who the criminal is and why he committed the crime.

Except it doesn’t.

In reality, our social media-infused society is more narcissistic, conceited and vain than ever – we as consumers are so self-absorbed in our own customized color-coded wants and desires for convenience we’re more narcissistic than ever – so to point the finger at a criminal and blame his narcissism for the crime is not only hypocrisy of the last resort, it’s blindingly disingenuous on our part.


In the same way that the word psychopath was sticky and popular for a while, because a lot of the traits of psychopathy do translate directly into criminality [heartlessness, lack of empathy and pathological lying], narcissism also has a feel-good stickiness to it. Both terms are sticky because they resonate to some degree. It is invariably somewhat true that a crime is going to be, and appear to be, cruel, heartless and selfish. But the fact is, many people in ordinary society are selfish and cruel. Many others are high-functioning psychopaths and pathological liars – certain professions attract these psychopathic personalities: chefs, lawyers, CEO’s, salespeople, television reporters, surgeons, cops, journalists and members of the clergy.


So to call a criminal a psychopath is really to associate a criminal with a vast swathe of society. You’re not really narrowing it down by using the term, instead by using a cliche, you’re invoking a stereotype, and probably incorrectly.

More: Professor believes Christopher Watts could be a psychopath


Narcissism is similar. To brand a despicable criminal a narcissist feels pretty gratifying, doesn’t it? The word has a powerful zing to it, like atheist or pedophile. A narcissist is characterized by extreme selfishness, he craves admiration, he has a grandiose or exaggerated view of his own abilities, and his self-centeredness may be so extreme that he struggles to differentiate himself from external objects [say, a large house, trophy wife or mistress, bank balance or pot of gold].

And like the psychopath, an extreme narcissist is a pathological liar. Thus, the real criminal character-trait we want to look out for is habitual lying.

And so, this is where the “N” word breaks down in the Chris Watts case. If you’re going to accuse Watts of being grandiose, never wrong, wanting to be the center of attention, addicted to something [or someone], arrogant, lacking in sympathy, controlling and/or manipulative, two-faced etc, to be fair you’ve got to apply those traits to Shan’ann as well. I know, I know, that’s victim blaming. But I’m not going to let those attached to the “N” word wriggle out of it that easily.

Blame Chris Watts all you like for being a narcissist, apply those traits to Shan’ann – or don’t – but before you’re done, apply them to yourself as well. That’s the real litmus test.


If we’re being honest, if the Narcissistic label describes Watts best then it also describes plenty of us too, and many people we know, doesn’t it? I’m not at all sure, for the majority of Watts’ life prior to the crime, whether he can be genuinely associated with grandiosity, arrogance, provoking others, putting others down, blaming others, or wanting to be the center of attention.

Some aspects do ring true, like his being potentially irresponsible with money, as well as with his wife’s pregnancy, and with the lives of his loved ones. But how many among us are loyal to a fault, have never cheated, and have solid bank balances right now?

How are your finances? How often do you lie? How do you [or I] respond to criticism?

None of this is intended to defend or justify Watts, it’s an effort to make the case for the applicability and appropriateness of the “N” word. I hope that much is clear. By now it should be obvious that the Narcissism label is about as apt as the Psychopath label, which is to say not apt at all. It’s a generalization. If we want to explain who Watts is, and why he did what he did, narcissism isn’t the diagnosis.


The poster boy for a narcissistic murderer is Oscar Pistorius. There is a huge amount of arrogance, conceit, self-centeredness etc, and much of it is based on massive attention and adulation in the face of massive inadequacy and insecurity. OJ Simpson is arguably also a classic case of a narcissistic criminal. Both these men are – or were – celebrities. That’s the level or dose of narcissism we’re talking about when it’s relevant to true crime, and guess what – our own narcissism and voyeurism played directly into the hero worship that created these celebrity personas.

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In reality, every psychologically healthy human being is a narcissist. We all have to maintain a healthy level of narcissism. It’s a minimum level of self-love we have that causes us to take care of things like personal hygiene, and basic socially acceptable behavior.


When a sibling sees another get a slightly bigger piece of cake, or a few more drops of soda, or a slightly more expensive toy come Christmas, they go crazy, demanding equal treatment. This is actually healthy narcissism; it protects them from being trampled on and taken advantage of. It reminds the parents not to favor the one over the other, or there will be hell to pay, and there should be when there is unfair favoritism.

So when it comes to true crime, who decides how much narcissism is excessive, and when it plays into criminal psychology when we’re all narcissists to some extent, and we’re a more narcissistic [selfish, vain, materialistic] society than we have ever been!

Who’s going to do it? Who’s going to decide this or that criminal is too narcissistic. Relative to who, or what?


In order to fathom who a criminal is or why they do what they do, we have to do the much harder job of figuring out who they are. We have to get to know them. We have to construct a narrative. We have to find out about their history, life story, love life, backstory, family, friends, enemies, personality, attachments, failures – all of  it. That takes time and effort. It’s through their identities that we figure out the who and why. It’s through spending a lot of time deciphering their language, behavior, body language, semantics, preferences, likes and dislikes etc. that we start getting into their heads. We listen to their music, examine their tastes [in clothes, food, sex], all of this tells us far more about a person than the “N” word.

If you’re a true crime fanatic and you’ve been banding the “N” word around a lot lately, please stop doing it. If everyone calls every murderer a narcissist, all we’re doing is agreeing that we have no fucking clue who or what we are dealing with. The “N” word, as far as I’m concerned, is almost as bad as the “he just snapped” explanation.

But that’s a rant for another day.

More: “Chris Watts Just Snapped”

Dr. Phil On Confessed Killer Chris Watts: ‘He Started Making Really Dumb Mistakes Really Early’

Was An Extra-Marital Affair The Motive For Colorado Killer Chris Watts To Murder His Family?

‘Chris Watts Is What We Call A Family Annihilator,’ Says Former FBI Criminal Profiler


  1. BAMS

    This has driven me crazy from the beginning as well and you’re right when you say everyone has been bandying the word around when describing Chris Watts because they think it makes them sound intelligent and knowledgeable. I’m no Psychologist so I was also reluctant to use that word on him and also because, quite frankly, he seemed to be BEYOND the generalised notion of what a narcissist is. People also don’t realise that there is more than one type of Narcissist and Chris Watts clearly doesn’t fit the stereotypical one, he had covert narc traits for sure but he had much deeper psychological issues going on is my guess.

    You’re also correct when you said that all of us possess or display Narcissistic traits at some point or another.

    Covert Narcissist:

  2. boycie

    I don’t think Dr. Phil takes the time to study some or most of the cases he talks about on the television. Probably has a team of researchers writing a script which he just reads off the teleprompter. Also has analyse and explain the cases in such a super simplified way for his audiences to understand what he is talking about.

  3. Daisy

    I see him fitting more on the Aspergers spectrum than Narcissistic.

    • bassekrokke


  4. julinka1981

    Hmmm.I haven’t seen Dr Phil video yet.But I suggest is best to familiarise yourself what narcissist actually is.Narcissists don’t have to be grandiose,centre of the attention etc. That’s a preconception most people make. It is also important to look at his childhood and family dynamics to actually see what path led Chris to have a personality disorder.Have a read below,sounds familiar?

    Narcissists can be very difficult to spot. Over time, they learn how to optimally manipulate their victims, and get by with their schemes without anyone questioning them.

    What makes it even more confusing is that they don’t all act the same way. Certain patterns of behaviour are consistent, such as when they idealise, devalue, then discard their romantic partners. But there are actually three distinct types of narcissists who act very differently on the outside.

    One of the toughest sub-types to spot is the covert narcissist, because they blend into the background much of the time. They aren’t a cliché of a grandiose, self-obsessed, “look at me” narcissist.
    Instead, they are quietly cruel and behave in a much more passive-aggressive way.

    For example, they may appear calm and professional to most people. But to those they are in a relationship with they are demeaning, cold, and abusive, and they can switch between these Jekyll and Hyde characters with ease.

    People with dark triad personalities thrive off other people’s chaos, so a common game of theirs is to set their romantic partners up for failure all the time, then punish them for doing so. Sometimes they make empty promises, then get a kick out of the reaction when they don’t deliver.

    They do what they want to do when they want to do And then they make themselves look like the victim.Some even deny making promises in the first place, gaslighting their partner into think they are losing their mind. Over time, the victim may completely lose touch with reality, known as perspecticide.

    Covert narcissists are conflicted!

    It may stem from covert narcissists wanting to be worshipped. They are conflicted because they think a lot of themselves, but are also incredibly insecure.

    A closet narcissist doesn’t say, ‘I am special,'” They point to something else — a person, a religion, a book, a dress designer — and they are special, so they feel special by association.

    You may wonder why anyone would be in a relationship with a covert narcissist in the first place, and the answer is complicated. According to Perpetua Neo, a therapist and doctor of psychology, one reason is covert narcissists are highly skilled at sucking their victims in with sob stories. This is a very effective trap for people who are high in empathy.

    Think about it like the covert narcissist has wormed their way into your heart.There tends to be a string of misfortune, like every single ex is a jerk, every single friend they have is unhealthy. Always ask yourself what kind of circle of friends this person has. If they have zero friends, that’s an alarm bell, becuase the whole world cannot be that unhealthy.

    Spinning tales about their abusive childhood, or their battles with addiction, leads highly empathetic people down a path where they start to feel sorry for the covert narcissist. Further down the line you’ll develop a sense of responsibility over them, tbecause you feel “tethered to their potential.”
    But this covert narcissist has no intention of changing their lives.It’s all a way of sucking you in and a way of getting attention, and a way of justifying their s****y behaviour towards you.

    The problem is, whether the covert narcissist is a colleague, friend, or partner, if you are their chosen victim, you will already know about their alleged problems. And often they can be hard to ignore. Some even claim they are suicidal, meaning walking away feels essentially impossible for the victim.

    “This will be a way to condition you into a sense of fear and walking on egg shells around them, so next time you are not going to hold them accountable,” Neo said. “They may even say this very common statement: ‘I’ve never felt this way about someone before.'”

    This, again, gives you this responsibility to take care of them, even to the point you allow them to isolate you from your other friends and family.

    With a covert narcissist, their emotions are paramount, but the victim’s needs and feelings are up for debate.Everything is a competition, and nothing that happens to you even comes close to what they’ve been through.

    They’ll simply give their victim the silent treatment as punishment until they give up and surrender.

    Escaping the clutches of a covert narcissist is hard because they drain their victims of energy and resources until they find a new target.

    • nickvdl

      Julinka, you really do love to spray the narcissist label around. So let me ask you, what kind of narcissist are you?

      • bassekrokke

        Truly, no offense meant, but this is exactly what I am referring to in my earlier reply to you.

      • Mustang Sally

        Bassekrokke, did you read his recent blog about labeling narcissists and the test included for reference? I’m not defending anyone because I totally get what you have been saying (and people are capable of defending themselves, if they wish), I’m implying our host has a rather crass way of expecting the participants here to have a much broader vision and deeper understanding of the big picture before he will accept any critism, analysis, or interjection of opinion. It’s tyranny (remember, Nick! I have a warped sense or humor!!!), pure and simple, but we wee supplicants assess the meaning, decide if there is any validity to the reprimand (whether hidden or blatant), and proceed accordingly.

        • nickvdl

          This site is about Rocket Science, and the community and conversations are expected to be more intelligent than elsewhere. If enforcing those expectations is seen as crass or unreasonable so be it. When I see adults engaging in juvenile conversations using juvenile grammar and simplistic slurs and insults, it irks me, because it’s not the standard I hold myself to, and it’s not the kind of community I’m trying to create here.

          Intelligent discussion doesn’t come naturally – I guess – to most people.

          Can’t keep everyone happy, and if people are put off, that’s fine. There are enough intelligent people to form a decent true crime community here, and an unlimited number of idiots and trash talkers that need constant prodding to behave and culling.

    • KW

      You are absolutely right! I have years of study behind me on Covert Narcissism

      I know how they operate, what they lack, and I’m convinced he is one. CW shows all the signs. When I’m looking at their relationship, it actually shows how these two were a “perfect” energetic match as well in all this. CW being unfaithful in different ways looking for outside high to feel alive, through this bi-polar dynamic…. Covert Narcissists are unable to feel love… they have no empathy. Everything they do, is for benefits, nothing else. Since they are empty of a genuin self, they try to find different types of people and identities to find who they are… They simply can’t see consequences and they don’t care how this affects others

  5. Sylvester

    I used the word sociopath so I suppose I’m just as guilty as Dr. Phil with all of his pop psychology analysis. Once upon a time Dr. Phil was a jury consultant. Which is a very good career for someone with degrees in Psychology – then he ended up on Oprah at some point and she liked him enough to give him his own show. But he gets things wrong – the girls bones were not broken. Didn’t he take time to read the autopsy reports? I’m going to assume Watts was given tests while he stood around in lock up and we don’t know how he tested, but I’m sure if he had psych disorders had they not rushed to judgement it would have come out.

    I’m just not there yet in understanding how he could have murdered his girls. I’ve read articles about family annihilators and I don’t know that there is a “type”. If so then we have to say that the annihilators are also psychopaths. I’m afraid there is still 2% doubt with me that he killed the girls – so if I were on a jury I’m sure I could be persuaded that that doubt is reasonable, and I would not send him to death. And I might hang the jury as well. He should have had a trial. I think he was persuaded that they knew he had killed Sha’nann, as he confessed to that, and they knew he had disposed of the bodies in a crude way and concealed it so he would have had a rough time at trial – but he never confessed to killing the girls and without a confession they would have to prove he did that so I say prove it.

    • nickvdl

      My first response was also that the bones weren’t broken, but it’s an “honest” mistake in the sense that a rookie to this case would assume that they could or should have been. It does make me wonder – weren’t they? Yes, the reports don’t say bones were broken, but the reports were sealed initially, and Watts did get a plea deal.

      8.5 inches is very narrow.

      One thing I appreciated by Dr. Phil was that he got the spelling of the names right – Shan’ann, Niko.

      • Kim C.

        This “bones had to of been broken” statement had me scratching my head as well? I wondered if there was something he may have learned that I may have missed …doc. dump.

      • mitzi2006

        On her grave placard and in shan’anns obituary it was spelled Nico

        • nickvdl

          That’s right. Do you know how Shan’ann spelled her unborn child’s name in her text messages?

  6. Sylvester

    I also don’t how there wasn’t anything in the stomach. Except oil in Bella’s case. And even that is suspicious to me because you cannot swallow when you are dead. They had cold pizza and a snack so where was that in the stomach contents.

  7. Sylvester

    I’m going to correct what I said here. Oil was not in the stomach. In Bella’s case the oil was found in the chest cavity blood. A hydrocarbon and oxygenated volatiles panel was performed which determined there was the chemical components of oil in the chest cavity blood, not stomach.

    Also it takes roughly 6 hours in a child for food to pass from the small intestine to the lower intestine and colon for elimination. That moves up the timeline to much later after Watts was seen barbequeing.

    • nickvdl

      Time of death is one of the enduring mysteries of this case. Just because Watts said the kids ate pizza, doesn’t mean they did.

      Being suspended in heated oil inside a hot oil tank for 4 days is like literally being inside a massive intestine – there’s heat, there’s chemicals, there’s a breakdown. So it’s difficult to say whether an exothermic situation like that would activate or perpetuate the body’s normal digestion post mortem. We know digestion doesn’t stall abruptly after death, it just slows and then gradually stops. So it’s possible in this situation that process is extended greatly.

      We also don’t know if the oil penetrated the body and digested the food [if there was any] directly. There were reports that the bodies were saturated with oil, and given these substances can cause nose bleeds in workers simply visiting the site, it does suggest what could have occurred over 4 days of direct immersion.

      There are at least two scenarios associated with the children eating. 1) that this final ingestion involved drugging or sedating them via the food or contingent on the meal 2) that their last meal involved some kind of altercation, causing Watts to snap.

      Since Watts was required to give the children medicine anyway, it seems unnecessary that he’d need to lace dinner with some sort of stealth drug. He could simply have replaced the normal medicine with something lethal.

      It’s also possible they never had dinner to begin with. We just don’t know.

      • mitzi2006

        Shananns father said he FaceTimed with kids at 5 and they were having cold pizza so there is outside statements of them eating

  8. Sylvester

    As usual your points are very good. Watts said CeCe was given Singulair every night, and sometimes Epinal yet that wasn’t found at autopsy either – which might merely indicate he wouldn’t bother with any of that if he knew it would be their last night on the planet. If they were drugged then the oil might remove any traces of that as well – or break down the chemical components of the drugs.

    The office in their home looks chaotic (much like JonBenet’s bedroom) compared to the other rooms minus the master bedding. Medications are on the desk. Medications for children – or adults – are not usually strewn on an office desk. She’s leaving for a trip – why ransack your office before you go? I’m going to suggest Watts may have been looking for something to put in their food or drinks from that location and it’s near the kitchen. And, her handbag was found in the office before he moved it. Someone here mentioned that. There wouldn’t be any light from windows in the office area if the office area were to take on more significance in this crime.

    • BAMS

      Speaking of medications… when the cadaver & trauma dogs were going through the house, did anyone notice the person with the body cam focusing intently on the huge box of what appeared to be massive loads of meds in it? Any ideas as to what was in there?

      • Karen

        I think that was in the basement on the shelf where they had that huge stockpile of medication

  9. sheis

    No matter how much people try to shoehorn Chris into a “Narcissist” box (even a “covert” one), I’m not seeing it. I see passive/aggressive, I see sneaky, but that’s it.

    Frankly, I think Shanann was more of a narcissist, IMO.

    And I’m going to piss off even more people by questioning the autopsy. It didn’t mention that the girls’ adenoids had been removed. Wouldn’t that be mentioned? And how about the one child (Bella?) who had the abnormally narrow esophagus? Not mentioned. Maybe standard autopsy would not go deeply into those details, but I assume the trachea and esophagus would be examined carefully, since Chris claimed they were strangled. Either the ME wasn’t very observant or the children’s health issues were… exaggerated? Nonexistent?

    • nickvdl

      Autopsy also didn’t mention scar on Shan’ann forehead and surgery scar to her neck. No mention of her medical status either [“no disease”].

      • mitzi2006

        It did mention the hardware in her neck. I don’t believe autoimmune disorders are visible on autopsy’s other than the damage that’s done, hers was possibly not present long enough and being treated early may not be visible yet. Fibromyalgia I know for sure shows no signs on autopsy or lab findings. Some bodily samples are recorded as being sent out to labs and those reports may not be included in the general autopsy.

    • BAMS

      He might have had covert narc traits but most people display overt or covert traits now and then anyway. What CW had, whatever he had, was more than narcissism. Pull all his mental health records out I say! Assuming they even exist.

  10. Sylvester

    And when the defense team wanted to do separate swabs on the girls necks the judge ruled that he wasn’t going to tell the ME how to do his job, so request denied. Maybe the autopsies were rushed to conclusion just as Watts was rushed to plead guilty to avoid trial. What we are seeing here in this country is a two-tiered justice system.

  11. BAMS

    So should we trust the autopsy reports in that case? Maybe the public wasn’t privy to the whole report for some reason?

  12. Sylvester

    I haven’t heard anything about nail clipping results either. Was his DNA under any of the three victim’s nails? . And to say that they don’t know what the smears and stains were on the pillow cases and sheet – wouldn’t they test it? Is it animal vegetable mineral or chemical. And the hairs. And the whole back seat of his truck.

    • nickvdl

      Joining the dots…and so many of those dots seem to be missing when you look for them. This case pretends to be about full disclosure, but it’s not. It’s ironic – everyone seems to be hiding something.

      • BAMS

        I think that’s why everyone is so frustrated and can’t seem to let it go. I’d love to turn my back on this as it’s all starting to make me feel miserable. Not to mention how time consuming focusing some of my attention on it is. Right now I’m just highly suspicious of so many things that have been omitted, swept aside or don’t add up.

    • sheis

      Very good points, Sylvester! I am not familiar with what an autopsy should examine, and how in-depth they go. I just think that there’d be mention of missing anatomy, such as tonsils or adenoids or appendix, uterus, etc.; things that are commonly removed.

      I have so many questions….

    • Marie

      Sylvester, have you seen the video on YouTube? There is an enlarged view. You can clearly see him putting a bag in the back of his truck, not inside of the truck.

      • nickvdl


      • Marie

        Nick, I don’t know how to send links from this phone. The video was from Hudson

    • bassekrokke

      Good point!!!! I am amazed at how incisive you folks are in here. Also, I just realized my ex-husband was a lot like Chris! I suspect he is on the Autism spectrum, as well.

  13. Natasha

    Watts may or may not have NPDt, but it’s ridiculous to suppose that one cannot be a narcissist because we all have narcissist traits. Most people do not have a complete lack of (emotional) empathy, diffuse exploitative intent or a constant need to be admired and told how fantastic they are. So while we all may crave approval or put our needs first from time to time, they’re not so extreme to cause complete self-centeredness and an inability to love others.

    • nickvdl

      it’s ridiculous to suppose that one cannot be a narcissist because we all have narcissist traits. >>>that’s not the contention being made here. Let’s be specific. Are you less of a narcissist than Chris Watts? Are you less of a narcissist than Shan’ann was? Think about that for a moment.

  14. Sylvester

    I’m considering another theory. The agent interviewing Chris Watts says he thinks something happened with the girls and Chris had to clean it all up for Sha’nann. If that’s true – that something, some altercation or accident happened with Bella, then although they were having financial problems and marital problems and he found someone new is true, it may not have been the motive. So if I go down that road did Bella hear or see something she shouldn’t have or was there an accident that was of course on his watch that he had to cover up? CeCe would have already been asleep, there was no struggling there. He has to kill Sha’nann because once he’s done away with the kids, she has to follow – he’d never be able to explain it and he is a coward. And if he’s a coward it takes quite a bit of guts to kill your whole family doesn’t it? But if part of it was an accident, then he’d have to go through with the rest of it. He’d have no choice. Chris says he knew it was all over when he killed Sha’nann. So think about that in the context that one was an accident or due to an altercation, the other two to cover up the first. His intention was not to wipe out his whole family and get a “fresh start” but to cover something up that was part unintentional, part intentional.

    • nickvdl

      Sounds like the introductory chapter in Jose Baez defense of Casey Anthony. Most people respond to accidents where someone dies in a spontaneous, normal, non-premeditated fashion. What you’re doing here is plucking a theory out of the ether, and snipping the dozens of little strings that tie together the other – cogent – version.

      In this scenario then, for example, Watts deletes his Facebook…and it’s just a huge coincidence. His affair…irrelevant. Debt, irrelevant. Personalities of Watts, his wife and children, irrelevant. Meltdown over nuts, irrelevant.

      After the accident, he’s not shaken, and continues what I call post meditation. Knows exactly where, when and how to dispose of the bodies. Performs that task like clockwork. Calls the school, calls the banks, calls the realtor. But none of these have any bearing on the crime. It’s all just random co-incidence…

      • Eve

        Hey man, “everyone grieves differently.”

  15. Sylvester

    I’m glad you slammed my other theory – the less theories I have the better! I mean that, truly. It’s just very hard to reconcile the Chris Watts who seems so loving to his daughters to the one who planned to get rid of them, and stuck them in oil. You know? So I thought maybe he’s a sociopath – incapable of having feelings. Yet then you pointed out that he must have had feelings for his parents and his mistress. He couldn’t have “cracked”, or snapped – no one even knows what that means. So i do appreciate the way you have put many many hours into investigating all of the pieces to this puzzle and I think we’ll all just have to continue to do the hard work of continuing to investigate this bizarre murder and burial.

    I have an observation. During Sha’nann’s most horrible summer and after the peanut fiasco, she keeps hammering Chris. Then she presses him for what’s wrong. He finally communicates that he’s confused and mixed up, whatever the words were. Then she plays the victim card. I think had she showed some kindness, told him it would devastate her if he left because she loves him, he may have not come to such a horrible solution. Plus all of that texting – what must they have said to each other after returning from NC? She left for Arizona with nothing resolved in any kind of positive way.

    • Marie

      She probably wasn’t taking it seriously that he wanted out. Big mistake. And you are right Sylvester, all the texting! That is not the way to communicate with husband that is telling you he wants out, and why go on a trip after over month of being separated!? Maybe she needed to read a book too

  16. Sylvester

    He took a lot of measures to ensure his affair wouldn’t be found out, secreting away pictures, using Anadarko gift cards, cancelling facebook – but I think she finally figured it out – then goes on the Arizona LeVel trip because it was a prior obligation but bad timing. I kind of think in a way, Marie, she may have thought if he wanted to be divorced then he can get a taste of what it’s like to have weekends or weeks of one on one with the kids as you would with joint custody. See how he likes it, not realizing he could do something to the children. Imagine him planning this, lying in bed, or on the road to and from work. In his planning was it originally just going to be her, or all three.

    • Marie

      Good point, she may have wanted to give him a taste of single dad! I wish I could figure out this phone that I am using, my PC crashed, so I haven’t figured out how to send links from this phone. There is a video on YouTube, it’s enlarged and slowed down. You can see how calm he was. It almost made me sick watching it

      • Karen

        Are you speaking of the neighbors video?

  17. Sylvester

    There is a better close up of the blue bag by the way. It’s a tote bag – and I think possibly a carryon with her suitcase. What bothers me about the two things together is they are stacked so neatly together under the stairwell – she’s coming inside to a dark house – I would probably leave both items by the front door with my shoes. Second thing that bothers me is it’s no where to be seen later on. What does one usually carry in a tote – a book, some snacks, souvenirs, maybe a paper leis, etc. what a considerate husband to unpack her tote for her and then put it away.

  18. Milly

    If he had just meant to kill Shanann, what would he have done with the kids in his preplanned solo excursion to the oil site?

  19. sarahe6447

    This post made me feel understood, and humored. The narcissism hysteria has gone beyond buzz-word. I learned all about Narcissistic Personality Disorder in my teens, because I started studying psychology in essence to figure out what was wrong with my Mother?! The description reaches out and points at her like a giant arrow. There is no question about it and trying to jam it to to fit, like “welllllll if it doesn’t work it’s cause she is one, but covertly…” The single biggest flaw, with her anyway, is an utter inability to truly admit blame, in anything. She’s never genuinely apologized, and if she really fucks up it’s I’m sorry but…as in “well ok you caught me..but I only did it cause of (insert any reason other than my lack.)

    Interestingly, I DEFINITELY see that “one big flaw” in Chris-but not other traits of narcissism. Not just in that he isn’t magnanimous and arrogant but he doesn’t appear to be easily offended and hypersensitive to criticism…

    I also just read a book about Psychopathy by Dr. Kent Kiehl-he studies the brains of psychopaths for a living and can predict whether or not someone will have decreased grey matter on an MRI in their paralimbic regions. I really trust his expertise. He went through every psychopathic trait one by one and broke them down and gave examples-things like they don’t get embarrassed when they lie and you catch them, they just kinda keep running with it or change the subject, they tend to be nomadic and have trouble holding down jobs despite their intelligence, high-sensation seek, pathological lying, as in lying when telling the truth would make as much or more sense…Oh, and he says they don’t ruminate and rarely feel anxiety, and if you ask them about OCD symptoms, “hey Joe, do you ever worry about leaving the lights on?”-they’ll look at you like you’re speaking another language. Of course lack of empathy is the symptom everyone knows about and the most troubling, and their family members always say “we knew from a young age.””We hoped it was ADD.” “My sister chased me through the house with a knife when she was 7.” They’re born, NOT made.

    CW doesn’t fit. I would very much like him to fit. I want a name for the guy literally giggling and oozing glee after murdering 3 people presumably for the first time (I think so) and smashing his dead babies’ bodies into fucking oil tanks. Listening to Metallica with his dead-ass family in the backseat, like “yeeeeaahhhh!!” That’s madness! But he’s not mad either, “evil” is religious, “monster” don’t get me started on how often adults use that as a “reason.”

    Aannnd this is why the prosecutor said we have a “partial motive.”

  20. sarahe6447

    Sensation-seeking, and despite whether or not they are intelligent. Are the things that I meant

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